My guilt trip begins.............

I have decided to remove my Ryan saga from the my main blog and rather induldge in the guilt that accompanies it in this sidebar, so stay tuned for more update.................

Todays guilt trip started when I went to the kids camp website and saw what Ryan has to face on a daily basis, things like not being able to participate in the chocolate pudding wrestling, or the kids all sitting around tables and gorging on oreo cookies and tons of other stuff she cannot indulge in and I know there are so many kids who have some really horrific issues, but the truth is I feel for them and for their families but for me, for my world and my reality the hardships that affect my girls are the ones that tear at me. It may not seem that hard to an outsider especially those without kids or without kids the same age. Those who know how much 7 -8 year olds just want to fit in. How hard it is to be different inside but have everyone notice that you have to do things differently from them. Oh how my heart breaks for them. It is heartbreaking and I just hae to put this kind soul, my precious Ryan through so much. She is such a good girl and deserving of so much and I feel so sad for her that I can't make all of this dissapear....................